Friday, October 30, 2009

The Music Project for this Year

I haven't really done anything with "The Priory" (the new name for Prior Peter since I've grown less attached to the name "Prior Peter since RPM) since RPM 2 years ago and making a single album which, while it was ok, has some large portions that I refuse to listen to. This is why I've formulated a new plan for making some more music this year.

Starting in December (December 19th to be exact) I'm going to spend a chunk of my Christmas break recording a new album. There's an idea behind this album though. I don't just want it to be me. Last time I did that, I was unhappy with the results. I want this to be something that any musician I know can contribute to. At this stage, I don't really know how that will work out but I have a mobile recording unit, so I'm sure it'll be fine. As I get closer to the actual recording time, I'll get more specific on the details of when and where I'll be recording things, but for the time being I'm just planning and sketching song ideas. Come December though, it'll be some madness.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Trouble Afoot in Higher Education

So I dropped a class. This will no doubt be news to my parents who haven't found out yet (don't worry mom and dad, I am getting a refund, and it's not as bad as it sounds). I dropped it because my marks weren't high enough in it (low 70''s complicated), it was taking up time from other courses, and I really didn't need to take it.

Dropping the course has sent me on a whirlwind tour of educational options though. Questions like "If I had to drop this course because the marks weren't high enough, what's to say that my other courses will be high enough?" and "Am I really good enough to go on to do anything academic or am I just average?". I had a dream last night that I scored a 50% on a midterm for one of my more important classes. Needless to say I awoke in a cold sweat wondering if it had really happened. I'm now waiting to get the mark back for the class so I can see if my dream predicted the future or not. I hope not.

Higher education is just frustrating. I just want to work but the world wants me to jump through all these hoops first and it's frustrating.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Episode #115 in which Ben's Education and Procrastination Fight to the Death

(Random side-note: TV shows have episode names but you would never know what they are unless you look them up or watch the shows on TV. What's the point?)

I constantly face an uphill battle with procrastination. Just when I think its squirmy head is under my heavy boot, about to be curbed stomped into a pulpy mess, it slithers away to attack again another day. Procrastination is one of those things in my life that I firmly have no interest in doing but that I do all of the time anyways. While I give myself ample time to get work done well, it's only when I am under stress or pressure that things actually get done. Give me two days to get some stuff done that would probably only take a couple of hours and I can guarantee you that only one of those two tasks will be finished, and I will have done it between 10PM and 12 AM on the second day I had to do it. Being responsible is so difficult sometimes.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Lost in Translation

I used to watch Digimon when I was a kid. I remember an episode where one of the main characters runs upstairs to his room and there's a shot of his house and his room and such. I remember thinking "I wish I lived there, in that cartoon house that's attached to a bakery in Tokyo somewhere".

So I was watching "Lost in Translation" today and there was a scene where Scarlett Johansonn was looking out over one of the areas of Tokyo and I started thinking about that house again. I don't really know why but I did. It's really weird for me to think about that house now because I know I'm beyond the stage in my life where I fantasize about being someone else all the time but I still am really attached to "that house" and would still very much like to live there, wherever "there" is. I feel like I'm looking for a home when I don't even know what city it's in.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

The Wednesday Evening Post

It appears that every year I end up with some kind of strange gap in my schedule that is too short to be useful but too long to prevent boredom. This year that gap is this evening. 2 hours of approximately nothing but no way to go home and I'm too burnt out at that point in the day to do actual work. Thus I am refashioning the Wednesday morning post into the Wednesday evening post. Prepare yourselves.

Last year I had this strange problem. I tried desperately to make friends with people, be friendly, and capitalize on opportunities. I failed miserably. I made very few friends last year. This year I am experiencing quite the opposite. I'm not trying to make friends but the keep popping up from all kids of places. I make them in labs, in tutorials, from my spring course, from friends of friends. It's the strangest thing. I don't get it at all.

It reminds me a bit of something crazy Jesus said once. Jesus is always saying crazy things, and for some reason I always find the wisdom in them long after I read them. He said "Whoever tries to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life will gain it". This whole reversal kind of blows me away. It's like trying to use reverse psychology. If you want something, you have to stop wanting it. It confuses me. I wonder what Jesus was getting at here.